I’m feeling quite proud of myself today. Some of you may think it’s no big deal but I actually took my kids on a 2-hour walk on my own today. Normally I find it hard to go anywhere without a huge panic attack rising so I usually depend on my husband to help me get through them. Well my husband was at work today and I faced my fears and I beat my anxiety today.
Anyone who knows me knows how bad I suffer from panic attacks. I’ve been this way for 5 years now and I decided today I would take a big leap and venture out of my safety zone. I actually coped really well and enjoyed my self with my kids just walking around the park.
It felt so good to beat my anxiety and all the little steps I’ve been taking the past 2 weeks have made this possible. I decided 2 weeks ago as I sat crying for no reason putting my makeup on that I’m done being controlled by my anxiety and depression. It was eating me up and spitting me out due to losing my dad 2 months ago and recently finding out that my nana has brain tumors.
I’ve realized that I want to live my life and be someone my kids can be proud of, oppose to a weeping mess who doesn’t go anywhere. Only I can make the changes in my life so that’s what I’ve been doing! My very supportive husband has been helping me a lot.He bought me my own website 2 weeks ago, he has helped me with a work out schedule so I can be happy in my own skin again and he’s helped me get out of the house a lot more.
My husbands work friend has just helped me get an allotment and I think that will really help me not just with getting out more but also with losing weight. It is going to give me something fun to focus on and I can’t wait to get started this week, it’s going to be a lot of hard work but I welcome the distraction.
Anyone else who suffers badly with panic attacks, believe me when I say that the only person holding you back is you. It has taken me 5 years to stop feeling sorry for myself and doing something about it and if I can do it anyone can. Find things that make you want to be a better person and find distractions to help you.
Thanks for reading.